


i know it's not easy

by arsatine



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Ambiguous Relationships, Canon Compliant, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Nostalgia, also seokmin's voice there was everythingni ever wanted, i love dont listen in secret too v much, i love seoksoo sm okay, jisoo and seokmin just wants to rest, non-au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-13
Packaged: 2019-03-30 10:47:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13949973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arsatine/pseuds/arsatine
Summary: Jisoo and Seokmin spend their precious sweet time before MAMA together in their own little bubble hidden away from everyone.





	i know it's not easy

**Author's Note:**

> i just realized that i have a habit of making seoksoo have soft compliments for each other whenever i write a fic for them awwww
> 
> also like im making 3 fics at once and then out of nowhere this pops out wow

_MAMA._

Seokmin and Jisoo were currently leaning against the cool cement wall of the emergency staircase in the building where the idols' waiting rooms were located. The show was bound to start in a couple of hours and they had just finished rehearsals. 

Instead of sleeping or waiting it out in the waiting room like the rest of their members or the rest of the idols present, they just decided to spend the precious, quiet time they had before they go public again. 

In this stairwell, this moment, they enjoyed the short time they had as Seokmin and Jisoo. Not Dokyeom and Joshua, the vocal members of the self-producing idol group, Seventeen. But Seokmin and Jisoo, two twenty-something-ish boys working at a far too young age, stuck in this mess of a reality just here to live out their dreams in exchange for their normalcy. Wow.

It was in moments like these where they contemplate the 'what if's and 'could have been's, the choices and the life they could be living right now. Sure, they basically lived off their fans' love and support whom they perform for, their passion as fuel to drive them forward but this was something that hung around them for the rest of their lives. It was a one-way road that either ended in flames or right where they dreamed of arriving at.

"We could have been college students trying to chase requirements on different sides of the world, Min." Jisoo whispers, loud enough to be understood but soft enough not to break the comfortable barrier of silence that separated them from the hectic preparations outside. 

"Yeah. I would probably be sticking to music even then. Music composition as a major or something." Seokmin replies, leaning his head against Jisoo's whose was leaning on Seokmin's shoulder. "You would go with Literature or Music too. Making original compositions about cheese and pizza and chocolate milkshakes."

Jisoo laughs, slapping Seokmin's arm playfully. "Yeah, making acrostic poems about every new word I learn and you would make ridiculously high-pitched songs." Seokmin laughs, squeezing Jisoo's wrist. "You would always skip sleep just to finish a project. Don't even try to deny it, Minnie."

Seokmin shakes his head fondly, his hand sliding from Jisoo's wrist to his fingers. He plays with each one, rubbing the callouses softly, humming to "Don't listen in secret" as he did so. "Sing it, Seokmin. I love your voice in that song." Jisoo requests, watching Seokmin's hands play with his fingers. 

"Sing with me?" 

"Okay."

  
_I know that_  
_Like that_  
_I know it's not easy_

They sing together, Jisoo's soft, soothing voice and Seokmin's strong, stable vocals, the lyrics echoing melodically through the stairwell. 

  
_Still getting over time_  
_May all be forgotten_  
_When I looked back_  
_Let me sing this song_  


Jisoo slips his fingers between Seokmin's fingers, intertwining them tightly. Seokmin's breath hitches at Jisoo's act of affection, making him miss a line but Jisoo continues singing softly.

  
_Do not listen to me_  
_Even if it's a song I can not hear_  
_This song I made for you_  
_Do not listen to me_  


Jisoo hums the next lines, closing his eyes in content, just listening to Seokmin's voice wafting through their little bubble.

  
_It's silly  
Nothing changes_  


Seokmin sings the said lines softly and Jisoo's eyes quickly open. He looks up at the younger boy with a disatisfied frown on his face making Seokmin falter in his singing. "...what?"

"Don't sing it like that. I like how you sing it on stage. Not softly but powerful and raw. It completes the song." Jisoo reprimands Seokmin. The latter grins apologetically. "Sing that part again." The older boy instructs, settling back on Seokmin's shoulder. 

Seokmin complies and he's rewarded with a tight, comforting, grateful squeeze on their clasped hands. He finishes the song, Jisoo's background humming still on the chorus tune. It's Seokmin's turn to just listen and enjoy and he thanks Jisoo with a squeeze on their hands. 

After a while, they are lulled back into the familiar, comforting silence; left with their thoughts and their presence consuming the other in such a calming way that they manage to stay peacefully in the moment.

"But I don't regret any of it." Jisoo tells Seokmin. "I don't regret going to that festival and getting scouted by Pledis. I don't regret leaving L.A. and coming to Seoul. If I didn't, then I wouldn't have met you guys. I wouldn't be in Seventeen and have all these memories with our friends, our management, our fans. We think of the possibilities so much, Seokmin. That we forget to enjoy and be grateful for the present. Of what's happening now and of what we already have." 

"I know. Maybe if we were really destined to meet each other then that pretty amazing but yeah. We do keep thinking of other scenarios when I know that I wouldn't have exchanged this one for anything in the world. This is our life now, Soo-hyung." Seokmin replies. "And we both know that we wouldn't want it any other way."

Jisoo laughs, all mellow and soft and it makes Seokmin smile. "Look at us. Talking about life and choices and possibilities like we're forty years old. We've got an entire journey ahead of us, Minnie. I think it's a bit too early to be looking back."

"No harm in reminiscing." Seokmin huffs against Jisoo's hair. "Okay." The elder agrees. 

"I've always looked up to you, you know?" Seokmin confesses. "The cool, guitar-playing, multilingual hyung from America with an amazing soft voice. You were weird. Still are. But I am too and that made me feel better about my own weirdness."

Jisoo slaps Seokmin's arm again for the 'weird' comment. "Well, I was jealous of you. You fit in with everybody perfectly right off the bat, you've got this strong, stable voice that everyone falls in love with, you're charismatic and funny and you're... you. Actually, what's there not to be jealous of? Plus, you're tall."

Seokmin pinks at the compliments Jisoo says but manages to retort back. "We used to be the same height though, hyung." Jisoo laughs again, and Seokmin doesn't think that he would ever get tired of hearing his hyung laugh. "My point exactly."

"Well, you don't have to be jealous. No, you shouldn't be jealous. Because honestly, everything about you is what makes people like you. And if you're jealous of someone, it means that you want to change that aspect of yourself. You're understanding and trustworthy. You got your own unique mellow, acoustic-ish voice that you completely own and you're also funny and very, very charismatic. Plus, your korean-american looks give you major plus points." Seokmin copies Jisoo's sentence phrasings from earlier.

"Thanks." Seokmin could hear the smile in Jisoo's voice. "No problem. Just telling the truth."

"Thanks." 

Seokmin jokingly hums a few bars from the demo he heard from Woozi a few nights ago for their next comeback. "No spoilers." Jisoo tries to say sternly but ends up bursting into soft peals of laughter. 

"Are you scared, Ji-hyung?" Seokmin asks, knocking the ends of his shoes against Jisoo's shoes sideways. "Yeah. We all are. But it's exhilarating, you know? Like when you're going bungee jumping from an extremely high height and you're scared you might fall but at the same time your heart is beating so hard because you're excited and you just can't wait to experience it. Unless you're deathly afraid of heights."

"What about you?" Jisoo knocks his shoes sideways towards Seokmin's and they just sit there with their legs extended, swaying side to side and knocking against each other. 

"I'm completely terrified."

"Fair enough." 

They watch their feet knock against each other sideways, a nostalgic childish vibe filling up their little bubble. 

They bask in the silence, knowing fully well that this tiny bubble of their was bound to pop any minute now before they are inexplicably thrust back into their routine. It's not that they hate it. It's just nice... taking a breath of fresh air every now and then. Everyone at least deserves that. 

"당신은 나를 완전하게 해, 석민니." 

Seokmin cracks a wide grin at Jisoo's abrupt confession. He tightens his grip on the older boy's hand and whispers, 

"당신은 나에게 무척 소중해요, 지수형." 

One minute. One last minute of that blissful silence and they enjoy it with slight desperation beating along with their hearts. Jisoo was scared. Seokmin was terrified. Both of them didn't want to leave this comfortable zone they'd completely settled themselves in. But they didn't have- couldn't have the luxury to be selfish. It's going to be okay. 

Jisoo's phone rang, the familiar ringtone echoing through the soon-to-be-empty stairwell. He sighs audibly before answering it. "Yes?"

"Shua, come back to the waiting room. Our manager's calling us already. Seokmin's with you right?" Jeonghan's voice crackled through the phone. 

"Yeah." Seokmin answers, making his presence known to the older boy. Jeonghan doesn't say anything for a couple of second although they were pretty sure he was grinning widely, his mocking presence so strong they could feel it through the phone. "Perfect. You two are the only ones not here yet. Coups-yah is getting the rest already. See you. Also, take your time fixing up." Jeonghan winks. Don't ask Seokmin how he knows. He just does.

Jeonghan hangs up and leaves Jisoo's ears red at his very, very subtle implication. "Damn you, Han." He mutters under his breath. They stand up, brushing off their suits as they did so. "Don't mind hyung, Jisoo-hyung. It's not like we were actually doing whatever he implied." Jisoo reddens in embarrassment even more. 

Seokmin holds the door handle, facing Jisoo, their fingers still intertwined, neither of them making an effort to pull away. That's fine. "Ready, Joshua-hyung?"

Jisoo beams at Seokmin and the younger wonders how they could call him the sun when Jisoo was obviously a far more brighter star that he could ever be. (Jisoo thinks the opposite and thinks that Seokmin is more that just the sun. He's also the moon and all of the stars that shimmer brightly in the sky.)

"Yep, Dokyeommie."

They may constantly think of the 'what if's and possibilities and all the other choices they could have taken, but they now that at the end of the day that this is their reality and that despite all the hardships and tribulations, they wouldn't have it any other way. 

Whether they were Seokmin and Jisoo or Dokyeom and Joshua. Whether they were Seventeen or just young adults chasing their dream. They may be scared and terrified but they know as long as they have each other, it's going to be fine.

**Author's Note:**

> "당신은 나를 완전하게 해, 석민니."  
> means "you complete me, Seokminnie." 
> 
> "당신은 나에게 무척 소중해요, 지수형."  
> means "you mean so much to me, Jisoo-hyung."
> 
> Idk but i just wanted to write a self-indulgent reminiscent SeokSoo fic lol. Also i absolutely love "don't listen in secret"
> 
> please tell me your thoughts on this in form of comments and kudoses thnx!!!!


End file.
